Thinking of Her Leaving

Lectio

So when they had come together, they were asking Him, saying, “Lord, is it at this time You are restoring the kingdom to Israel?” ⁷ He said to them, “It is not for you to know times or epochs which the Father has fixed by His own authority; ⁸ but you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you; and you shall be My witnesses both in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and even to the remotest part of the earth.”

The Ascension

⁹ And after He had said these things, He was lifted up while they were looking on, and a cloud received Him out of their sight. ¹⁰ And as they were gazing intently into ^[h]the sky while He was going, behold, two men in white clothing stood beside them. ¹¹ They also said, “Men of Galilee, why do you stand looking into ^[i]the sky? This Jesus, who has been taken up from you into heaven, will come in just the same way as you have watched Him go into heaven.”

Meditatio

The countdown is happening.  We will go to La Casa in 4 weeks and one day to pick up Amy.  I want her to come back, of course.  I also hate the idea of taking her away from those children!  I cry--right now--why?  Partly in sympathy for what I am pretty sure Amy will feel, and partly in sympathy for what I am also pretty sure the ninos will feel.  Is there something that we can say, perhaps a teaching or a "word from [You,] Lord," that will give them comfort?

Oratio

God of the orphans, please tell me if there is something that You want us to share with the ninos when Amy leaves.  Amy will likely be useless as an interpreter; so, if You do have a message, You will lead us to someone who can translate/interpret OR maybe make it simple enough so that I can learn Spanish in one short month?  :)  Seriously, though, please do whatever You do so well to make this event not a bad one, though it may be inevitably sad, but rather a powerfully blessed one.  I also want to bless the children somehow.  Show me how, please.

Contemplatio

Well, contemplation on this topic won't be hard.  I have already been thinking about it a great deal.  Thank You, God, for ... what? ... being my partner in this, for listening to me, for being the leader in this matter!

All Have Sinned

Lectio

"What then? Are we better than they? Not at all; for we have already charged that both Jews and Greeks are all under sin; as it is written,

“There is none righteous, not even one;
 There is none who understands,
There is none who seeks for God;
 All have turned aside, together they have become useless;
There is none who does good,
There is not even one.”   (Romans 3:9-12)

 ^"for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" (Romans 3:23)

Meditatio

Oh, boy.  This Scripture is being impressed heavily on my heart.  Not only do I see sin rampant all over the world, but I see it permeating and tainting my own heart.  It feels so helpless.  In the spirit of "radical acceptance," I want to be calm as I encounter such sinfulness.  It is, after all, inevitable.  On the other hand, in the spirit of pursuit of holiness (wasn't that a book title??), I want to strive.  Stop.  No more striving!  More correctly, I want to be holy, less sinful--ever less sinful--do I want to be what I cannot be?  If "there is none who seeks for God," can I ever become one who seeks for God?

Oratio

God of all creation, God of our fathers, God of the universe, I know--painfully so!--that I have sinned.  I walk in it, wade in it, breathe it in.  And I hate it.  Even now, my mind is being distracted by the things I have to do in a short hour before I go to work, and I would so much rather stay here and be with You.  Even the book I am slowing getting through, Erasing Hell, is helping me this Lent to appreciate more deeply just what You have freed me from. (Bad grammar, I know--let me get away with this one?)

When I encounter sin in others, I don't really handle it well.  I know that, in a way, they cannot help it any more than I can.  Yet it is still stinking, ugly, repulsive sin.  It hurts sometimes, too.  What did You do?  How repugnant we might have been to You, and yet Your love for us -- what? -- shielded Your holiness from the contamination of our sin!  May Your love for me and in me help me to love others, even in their sin, and as You did for me, inspire me to be ever more holy.  In Jesus's name and in the power of the Holy Spirit, which is the only way I could ever hope to do these things~~Amen!

Contemplatio

Keep this thought on my heart today and in the days to come.  Memorize these verses!!

Lectio Divina 6: Tuesday

On my heart: Paul, the "ateo," and Francis Chan's book, Erasing Hell.  Frightening combination!

Lectio Divina 5: Monday

Another day with my mother.  Also a sweet interaction with two of my great-nephews, Joey and Toby, and some Bible storytelling.

Lectio Divina 4: Sunday

"Gordon College is so liberal."

I think there is a verse in James about the tongue.  I will have to look it up.

Lectio Divina 3: Saturday

TBD--Day with my mother and my husband.

Lectio Divina 2

Friday, February 15

Weird interaction with Stephen (my supervisor and a new person to WRCH) and Lisa (a social worker who transferred in from Taunton)~

Briefly, let it be known that Lisa has had some trouble adjusting to WRCH.  She is a mother of two children, ages 11 and 8, and she drives a very long distance to come to work three days a week from 10:30 a.m. to 7:00 p.m.  She does not have it easy.

She is also a harsh woman.  She behaved very disrespectfully to our new deaf social worker, and the other young social worker whom I supervise was outraged.  (Side note: I had witnessed similar disrespect from our department head toward Gloria, and I was outraged at that.  More on that another time....)

Stephen tried to arbitrate the awkwardness between Lisa and me.  Lisa had publicly commented on my maternal character (which is, of course, true) in reference to an attempted communication I was sharing with her from one of her patients.  I won't go into detail now, although I may want to record this interaction at some point.  In short, she refused to allow me to share the patient's message by commenting on my character.

I did not handle this as well as I handled the situation yesterday with Tony.  I need to reflect on what that means in terms of the Lectio Divina model.  What do I need to read/hear? (Lectio)  On what do I need to meditate? (Meditatio)  For sure, I need to pray from the heart about this!!  (Oratio)  And lastly, contemplate mindfully about God's work in my heart, soul, and life. (Contemplatio)

“If the world hates you, ^[a]you know that it has hated Me before it hated you." John 15:18
 

 Lord, it is almost an idolatrous goal that we make ourselves likable.  I'm not sure how this works in my Christian life, but this lesson was an unpleasant taste of being misunderstood, judged, and disliked.  And once again, I didn't handle it well.  I will -- no, I cannot say that I will because I can't -- I will submit myself to Your changing me.  That I can, and will, do.  In Jesus's name and by the work of the Holy Spirit~Amen.